It’s so typical. I tell a guy I have worked in a sex shop, his head starts spinning. I tell him I have a blog filled with naked men, penises and other pleasure objects, his second head downstairs joins the spinning party. I know exactly what he’s thinking. No, not thinking.
His inner eye shows him images of me lying naked on the bed, surrounded by sex toys and dreaming of big, hard penises. Now he thinks She must be one dirty little man-eater! I tell him I am Dutch and a mother and there it is: the open-minded Dutch MILF-alarm goes off! His eyes pop out. This must be his lucky day! I must be so eager to see his version of The Naked Man, right now, at his place, on the club toilet, anywhere. But I am not. I am no man-eater and I have not been horny for quite some time. What can I say… even a girl who loves to write about sex and men gets numbed by the nuisances of every day life. Admittedly, my current mindset towards intercourse with other human beings does make life a bit boring. Honestly though, for now I am quite fine with being a Dutch libidoless MILF. Still, it does all sound a bit questionable on my side, doesn’t it?
How can you not be horny when you are surrounded by sex toys all day? Now that one is easy: You think you want to stuff yourself with cakes and chocolates all day when you work in a pastry shop? Thought so. How about all the naked men on your blog? Those images don’t turn you on? Hmm, not in the same way a photo of a naked girl turns you guys on. Come to think of it, a picture of a naked woman with a nice pair of boobies arouses me more than any photo of Brad Pitt being completely naked ever could. No, I am not a lesbian and I am not bi. Oh dear, thing are getting even more confusing… Answering that question obviously is a little bit more challenging.
Allow me to ask you this: How are we women supposed to get all wild and happy by seeing naked men when we are not used to seeing so much of it? Or rather: when we are not allowed to get all wild and happy about it? Because that’s how society has brainwashed us to think & tick. Being exposed to female nudity is fine. A woman’s body, her breasts, her ass, her vulva, it’s all beautiful, sensual, erotic and sexy. For ages it has been out there for us to look and like it. The male body on the other hand may be considered aesthetic, but not sensual.
A penis is a tool, a necessary evil to make sure our species survives and it’s gross! In short: we have learned that men desire and women are desirable. Men are sexually active, women are sexually passive. He gives it to her, she receives it from him. When she does give – give head for instance – we call it a (blow) job… Isn’t that interesting?And where’s the money, dudes!? This active-passive gender dogma we all have been living and believing also explains why imagery of male nudity does not have the same effect on us as female nudity does.
Let’s test this thought of mine. Let’s say you are a man and you are holding a photo of a naked woman in your hand. She lies on the bed, looking all seductive and willing, showing all her warm, moist goodies. Her eyes tell you she is waiting for a man – for you! – to take her to the moon and back. Looks hot, right? I think so too. Now it’s my turn. I have this photo of a naked man. He lies there, on the bed, looking quite handsome with his oily bi- and triceps. He must train a lot! Oh, look! He has an erection. Good for him! Pause. Test card.
The man in this motionless image may have the perfect body and a nice looking erection, but my cavewoman brain does not get the information it needs to get aroused. Apart from the fact that I can’t smell, touch or hear him, he simply does not move. He is not active. I cannot tell if it would feel good if he would give it to me. And I also can’t tell if his lust has anything to do with me – and that’s actually quite important for women… That’s the difference.
So why Naked Men, Happy Women, you ask? Because of all of the above. I want all of us to get used to male nudity, to appreciate it and to see the male body for what it is: just as beautiful, sensual, erotic and sexy as a female body. I want the penis to lose its taboo. I want men to feel free to show themselves, to feel comfortable with their bodies without being called weird, disgusting or gay. I want women to feel free to get horny by seeing a male body, a male ass, a penis without being called a slut or a nymphomaniac. I want sexual equality and fairness for both sexes. And I believe it all starts here, with being brutally, honestly naked.
Gabigirl – www.nakedmenhappywomen.org
Photo: (c) Aaron Tsuru tsurufoto.com